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People Change

“…some birds were never meant to be caged, their colours were too bright…”
From "The Shawshank Redemption" 
People are always changing. Our brain is a dynamic adaptive information processing organ that is constantly changing based on what we do with it. There are parts of the brain that are harder to change, but even the deepest cores of a persons personality and disposition are capable of being changed. Be careful what you listen too and watch, who you interact with and what you do: you are the ever changing product of your experiences, ideas, thoughts and choices. When we see something new, we change. When we learn something new we change. When we get to know someone new we change. Everything is always changing in this world, as change is a fundamental property of life and our minds.

Every passing moment is chance to change your future!

We all grew up with people who we found difficult for one reason or another.

The world is a broken one: the evidence in the pervasive persistence of injustices, crime, hatred, bigotry and inequities .

Some people are born mentally sick, with a genetic problem that causes psychosis. Some of these people end up as the leaders of corporations, as police officers and government officials.

A small minority of liars, pedophiles, rapists: greedy, vain, selfish people are everywhere constantly. Fortunately almost all of these "bad" people are capable of changing for the better.

A lot of these people were given a bad hand in life when they were born into a tough situation. Many people were not loved and nurtured as children. Many others were abused by older people with mental sickness.

Many people are born in families where love is missing. Some of these people grow up to become the sociopaths and narcissistic jerks that make life avoidably more miserable for others.

In other situations, mental sickness causes terrible choices from people that were given a perfectly reasonable and fair hand in life. Some embrace the hand they were given and play it well whilst others squander and waste what they were given. Some people grow up to become loving, generous, kind, reasonable honest people, others do not.

Sociologists estimate that in a developed country with honest laws, only about %5 of people turn out "bad". The vast majority of people overcome their problems and choose to do the right thing. The majority of people would rather work to forge their own way through life with dedication and perseverance, rather than being handed a pass and go to waste their life doing nothing or cheating others.

We see a great diversity in personality, ethics and morality with people. The good news is that almost everyone is capable of positive change.Even the sickest of people can choose to stop doing the wrong things that they do. When they start choosing to do the right with love on their hearts, their brain literally re-writes itself with positive change. 

Everyone's mind is constantly rewriting itself. Structurally and functionally, the human brain is always in a state of flux. The rate at which the brain changes depends largely on our choices. What are we eating? Are we staying mentally and physically fit? Did you know that physical fitness and mental fitness are related? Think about it: your brain is connected and controls your entire body. Coordinating movement is a very complicated mental task. Numerous long terms studies of every age group all conclude with the same basic thesis: physical fitness enhances mental function in all age groups.

Humans that embrace learning throughout their life tend to retain mental acuity and balance mental function in old age. People that choose to stay mentally and physically fit, do better all around in life. Studies regarding workplace efficiency found that physically fit people are up to %40 more efficient at work and they take up to %50 fewer sick days on average. Physically fit people are 5 times less likely to take antidepressants, cholesterol drugs, or other medications for sickness that is avoidable through lifestyle choices.

The Bible and Science both warn us that an idle lazy unproductive and wasted life is unhealthy mentally, morally, physically and spiritually. Addictions to anything can be incredibly destructive to all aspects of our being. Extremes and imbalance can be destructive to faith, family, friendship, mental and physical health. Balanced, reasonable healthy thinking and choices are the key to a "good" life.

Mental illness of many types is formed where people feel or are isolated from one another. When we interact with others, these interactions help to give our perspectives balance. When left to our own devices, our mind, unchecked, can spiral off into imbalanced mental sickness.

Faith warns us that we are to spend time with others who share our faith. Common sense warns us that we will grow in a given area by interacting with others who are knowledgable and interested in the same area. If a person interested in basketball spends time with other basketball enthusiasts, their passions and interests exchange.When we read a book, we glean ideas from the author or authors and these ideas change the way we think about the world. When we watch a movie, listen to a song, sit in traffic, ride our bicycles, walk: anytime we interact with the world or other living being, we are literally reprogramming our brains.

People are able to change because the human brain is constantly changing. Our emotional desires direct how that change is translated into thoughts, choices, actions and behaviors.

Inspired by a spirit, heart and mind filled with a Love, a person is capable of being slow to anger and generous with mercy. God tells us that a educated mind is a mind capable of greater understanding.
When we take the time to understand something, it gives a new perspective. It is foolish to write someone off whom we have not taken time to understand.

Everyone has a story and everyone is unique.

I learned a few years ago that my school mate nemesis had an alcoholic mother. Amazing how that simple fact added depth and understanding to my interpretation of our past interactions.

I have no idea how I would have turned out if my mother was an alcoholic. I never lived in his shoes, experienced what he experienced. What I am called to do as a loving person is forgive wrongs that were done against me in the past.

I am called to use my mind and my heart to see the difference between wrong and right, the difference between a sin and a sinner. I understand that negative emotions are toxic. I understand that love is healing.

I have seen again and again that good people with bad ideas are capable of changing their tune for the better. Sometimes people just need a little help. Sometimes people just need an idea or perspective that they didn't have. If you see a friend a person doing something harmfull, tell them that you care, explain why you are telling them. If they feel love and accepted and not judgement, they are more likely to address the issue you identified. Dont judge them, help them with kind loving words.

We are called to share love with others so that they can be slow to anger and generous with mercy and understanding.

People that feel loved and accepted by others tend to share that love and acceptance with others.

People are not only able to change, people are always changing whether they like it or not.

So ask yourself...

What is inspiring you to change?

Are you making choices to become the best version of yourself?

How are you choosing to change?


  1. The foolish fight meaningless battles. Many conflicts are just sand that waste your time. Focus on Love and Understanding Others and you will rise above to realize a hug or kind word is far more powerful than a gun.

    Love is more powerful than a nuclear weapon.

    Love is the glue of acceptance, mercy, kindness, humility, understanding, empathy and sympathy that holds family, faith and friendship together.

    Love is what binds that which has real meaning and value together in life.

    In the past I got caught up in immature verbal battles over stupid meaningless issues: I was in error.

    I still struggle always to see everyone in the world through eyes of love. I sometimes find it challenging to clearly separate the sins from the sinners. I am quick to overreact to bad drivers in traffic for example. Realizing that I am a sinner, but different than my sins, helped me to understand the difference between the sin and a sinner.

    I share this post because I want to inspire others to think about it.

  2. Anger harms the holder of the anger not the subject of the anger!

  3. Well said Aaron. The power to Choose is in everyone's hands, it is a matter of making that choice.

    One thing that really set me free was when I learned that Forgiveness is a Choice and Not a feeling... Wow! I found as I would Choose to forgive and pray through it my feelings would begin to align with my choices.

    The same is true for many things, it may not be comfortable at first but when we begin to Choose to Forgive, exercise, eat healthy foods(for a few examples)... we will begin to desire to do those things, as our hearts and minds change for the better and our health will improve when we remove the emotional stressors that cause sickness and disease.

    Our bodies don't differentiate between physical, emotional or environmental stressors; they all make our mind and bodies Sick!

    The Power to Change Starts with a Choice...

    May people learn truth and make choices that will set them free!

    People are capable of Change!