https://youtu.be/pJEeUU7HZbA?si=YCAJ7_kOpJzLgYAt
Jesus Christ was born of poor teen parents, in one of the most backward places of the Roman Empire
He recruited men to teach them the love of our Lord God, the master creator of all in all realms
Jesus is for you, in you, with you & about you if you love God the way he commanded & turn away from habitual sin. There is nothing you have done that God will not forgive you of if you pray unto his holy name for guidance & help & turn away from sinful acts & become godly & Christ like in thought, action, word & behavior, thinking of & treating other people as better than yourself.
I need Jesus Christ, God & the Holy Spirit badly on many levels & readily admit on X formerly Twitter why I need faith in God, because I am prone to many kinds of sin & disobedience & am a flawed hypocrite sinner no better than any other person & think of all other people as better than me because I have remodeled my heart after the example that Christ Jesus set after reading the bible 2X in 2020 & going to the For My Life retreat in Georgia with Meg my lovely wife.
I will openly admit that I have an ongoing problem looking upon graven images, something that started as a teenager when my adoptive parents thought I was gay gave me heterosexual pornography magazines like Playboy & Hustler, so that I would pleasure myself (jerking off) to the images of physically beautiful young women featured in such publications. Their idea was that this could condition me to date girls of my age & pursue future relationships with women. What is most sad about this is that I was never gay & never found men sexually attractive as a biological XY boy & then man, my natural genetic gender.
I am not against gay or lesbian or transgender people, only saying that I am a biological XY man married to an XX female named Megan. I only find women sexually attractive, not men. I also like when a man loves a woman & songs about this. I am old fashioned & prefer the nuclear family between mom & dad & children over modern examples of family configurations other than that, but am determined to show all other people loving kindness & not judge anyone, so that I might show people the love of God, the love of Christ Jesus who died for anyone who calls upon his name as Lord & Savior, so that they may not die in death but have everlasting life in heaven through salvation unto God through Christ Jesus, amen!
In my early 20's my adoptive parents chastised me for not going to night clubs or clubbing to rapid date women to find what I "Like" & to have "A good time" as I alternated between serving missions for the Pentagon & coming home again to read Wikipedia for thousands of hours for many hours every day when home, to learn more about everything with an unquenchable curiosity to learn as much as possible to prove everyone who doubted my ability to exceed wrong.
I worked out weight training, snowboarding, bicycle riding, hiking, increasing my strength & endurance to prove everyone wrong who doubted me, while college & Wikipedia helped me as a savant to increase my understanding & knowledge about all things, with a desires to become God like in understanding to prove everyone who doubted me wrong, to show up the people who bullied me & made fun of me in school for being weak, uncoordinated, gay, soft, & weak. I was determined to overcome, to rise above, to become exceptional in every regard, to show all the naysayers wrong & prove their inaccurate assessments of me were wrong & off basis. I was determined to become a literate scholar of many subjects, inspired by Leonardo Di Vinci & Albert Einstein & Nikola Tesla.
I have many hobbies currently laser engraving, previously 3D printing, working on cars, making things with tools DIT style fixing, repairing & upgrading things. I have proclivity for advance scrapping & breakdown of broken electronics & pro recycling worldview & preference & like VFD's displays & LPS lighting with magnetic ballasts & other antique technology like Tube TV's & microwave ovens while I also embrace modern Hybrid electric cars since 2004 & promote Toyota examples on Myspace, then Facebook now X formerly Twitter. I like superior efficiency air source mini-split heat pumps as the best solution to HVAS for most indoor spaces. I promote Speed Queen reliable washers & dryers that last a long time in daily use cases in the real world, & Sun Frost fridges that use 90% less energy with intelligent designs made in California to order for expensive prices for the storage volume compared with other fridge brands for example. I really like the idea of going less with less fuel & lower emissions & our 100 MPG 2013 Honda PCX-150 scooter a great warm weather vehicle example of such, as is our 2010 Prius III or 2022 Corolla Hybrid. My current bike a 2020 Yamaha MT03 & with 40 HP it is fast enough with a top speed of 112 MPH. Incredibly I get over 60 MPG in both the Corolla Hybrid and MT-03 on regular unleaded gasoline.
I want to encourage you by telling you that I am a work in progress, still being remodeled by God as I continue to seek relief from mental torment to do the wrong thing or think or act inappropriately. I have never actually cheated on my wife in first person, but have done so in thought, which makes me upset & hate myself. I often wonder what is wrong with me, that I would have such thoughts, but know where the entered my mind. Back when I was 16 years old living with my parents, when they gave me those taboo magazines, I had first experienced suicidal depression after taking a class in high school called contemporary American History, where I learn things that made me anger & bitter about the way the world is today & was recently. More recently I chose to forgive my earthly genetic father, who left when I was a newborn baby, traveling from America to India never to return. I chose to forgive the adults who sexually abused me as a young boy. I chose to forgive people who were mean to me in high school & college. I chose to forgive people who did me wrong, who cheated me, who betrayed me, who slandered me, who made me feel horrible by speaking intensely mean words to me, who cheated on me, who abused me, who neglected me, every person who did wrong against me, I made a conscious willful choice to freely readily forgive them so that God does the same for me when I die & face him for final judgement in Heaven.
I know that people struggle in different ways with temptation, lust of the flesh, idolatry, sin, & other kinds of inappropriate thoughts, but you never have to give into them & act on them. Just stop & say, it is ok, I know I am not perfect, but I am not that which I think or hear in my mind, & I chose to obey God, I chose obedience unto Christ Jesus empowered by the Holy Spirt. There is no such thing as a perfect person so do not feel bad if you need help like me. I share these hard truths, exposing my inner weaknesses publicly with the hope of helping someone else to make the world a better place for all people in a small way, even if I only help one other person that validates my life is meaningful with purpose.
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